More Fun #66 (April 1941) brings us the harrowing tale of "The Moon Orchid"! We find Bill and Prof in a steamy jungle, on another one of Prof's crazy plant-hunts! This time, it's the maybe-imaginary moon orchid....
How prescient of you, Congo Bill! No sooner said than done!
Is it just me, or does Prof's silent gasp of terror/Broadway kickline dance step remind you of someone? Let's see, who was it....? Oh, yes;
Anyway, no sooner does CB realize Prof is missing than he, too, is attacked. But the scrappy Bill fights back with a barrage of racist taunts!
"Black devils". Wow. Sounds like a Romney-Ryan* campaign stop! (*Dear readers of the future: you may insert here the name of the most recent Republican Presidential ticket.)
As explained in the text, CB and Prof have been nabbed by the bloodthirsty Mesabi tribe, guardians of the aforementioned Moon Orchid. The Mesabi apparently take their name from a mountain range....in Minnesota.
CONGO BILL FUN FACT: The Mesabi Iron Range, discovered in 1866, is the chief deposit of iron ore in the United States!
CB awakens next to Bill in one of their standard Physique Pictorial fantasy set-ups:
They're soon joined by a lusty young female!
"Entoo tali wambi sasu, walli" translates roughly as "I'm going to take this knife and wear it out on you!" But CB is saved by the timely arrival of a peg-leg white man!
In junior high school, I had a math teacher named Mister Marriot. Rumor had it that he had a wooden leg. Also, his flaming homosexuality meter rating fell somewhere between Charles Nelson Reilly and Little Richard. When my big sister and her prom date, both awkward and misfits, decided to blow off the prom they went to Mr. Marriot's house and drank scotch with him.
One time he cornered me in the boys' room. So that he could offer my mother and I tickets to the symphony.
When my little sister was in his class, she and a friend were passing a note that said "Mr. Marriot is a peg-leg fag". Mr. Marriot saw them passing it, snatched it up, and read aloud: "Mr. Marriot is a peg-leg fag. OH IS HE??!??" He then tacked the note to the board and left it there the rest of the year.
True story.
But you really have to hear my sister's imitation to get the full effect.
"She just likes to kill, it's an inborn trait." Er, I.....yeah, I got nothin'.
Peg-Leg explains how he came to be a "guest" of the Mesabi:
CB, Prof and Peg-Leg organize their escape plan and make it to the edge of the village, where they happen to stumble upon (cue chorus of angelic voices)...
Prof can barely contain his excitement, and does perhaps the most manly act he's performed thus far in the chronicles - giving us some DILF beefcake while he's at it!
To cover their escape, Bill unleashes a barrel of nitroglycerin that Peg-Leg has just happened to have lying around since his capture, because nitroglycerin is a well-known tool of geologic expeditions. But....has Bill's enthusiasm for action finally done him in? Say it ain't so, Bill!
After a few harrowing seconds of worry, Bill proves that he's not only man enough to survive an explosion, but also had time to whip himself up a manly kilt of acacia leaves. The tailoring is impeccable!
I DO find it a bit suspicious that Peg-Leg is on his knees and Prof looks like he's been caught in the act of fastening up his britches, but whatever. C'est la vie, as they say in the jungle!
How prescient of you, Congo Bill! No sooner said than done!
Is it just me, or does Prof's silent gasp of terror/Broadway kickline dance step remind you of someone? Let's see, who was it....? Oh, yes;
Anyway, no sooner does CB realize Prof is missing than he, too, is attacked. But the scrappy Bill fights back with a barrage of racist taunts!
"Black devils". Wow. Sounds like a Romney-Ryan* campaign stop! (*Dear readers of the future: you may insert here the name of the most recent Republican Presidential ticket.)As explained in the text, CB and Prof have been nabbed by the bloodthirsty Mesabi tribe, guardians of the aforementioned Moon Orchid. The Mesabi apparently take their name from a mountain range....in Minnesota.
CONGO BILL FUN FACT: The Mesabi Iron Range, discovered in 1866, is the chief deposit of iron ore in the United States!
CB awakens next to Bill in one of their standard Physique Pictorial fantasy set-ups:
They're soon joined by a lusty young female! 
"Entoo tali wambi sasu, walli" translates roughly as "I'm going to take this knife and wear it out on you!" But CB is saved by the timely arrival of a peg-leg white man!
In junior high school, I had a math teacher named Mister Marriot. Rumor had it that he had a wooden leg. Also, his flaming homosexuality meter rating fell somewhere between Charles Nelson Reilly and Little Richard. When my big sister and her prom date, both awkward and misfits, decided to blow off the prom they went to Mr. Marriot's house and drank scotch with him.One time he cornered me in the boys' room. So that he could offer my mother and I tickets to the symphony.
When my little sister was in his class, she and a friend were passing a note that said "Mr. Marriot is a peg-leg fag". Mr. Marriot saw them passing it, snatched it up, and read aloud: "Mr. Marriot is a peg-leg fag. OH IS HE??!??" He then tacked the note to the board and left it there the rest of the year.
True story.
But you really have to hear my sister's imitation to get the full effect.
"She just likes to kill, it's an inborn trait." Er, I.....yeah, I got nothin'.Peg-Leg explains how he came to be a "guest" of the Mesabi:
CB, Prof and Peg-Leg organize their escape plan and make it to the edge of the village, where they happen to stumble upon (cue chorus of angelic voices)...
Prof can barely contain his excitement, and does perhaps the most manly act he's performed thus far in the chronicles - giving us some DILF beefcake while he's at it!
To cover their escape, Bill unleashes a barrel of nitroglycerin that Peg-Leg has just happened to have lying around since his capture, because nitroglycerin is a well-known tool of geologic expeditions. But....has Bill's enthusiasm for action finally done him in? Say it ain't so, Bill!
After a few harrowing seconds of worry, Bill proves that he's not only man enough to survive an explosion, but also had time to whip himself up a manly kilt of acacia leaves. The tailoring is impeccable!
I DO find it a bit suspicious that Peg-Leg is on his knees and Prof looks like he's been caught in the act of fastening up his britches, but whatever. C'est la vie, as they say in the jungle!
1 comment:
First of all, Congo Bill should sue that woman that wrote the novel "Adaptation." was based on. I mean, with the exception of imaginary twin brothers, it's a blatant rip-off.
Speaking of Rip... Uh, yeah.
Today's youth and their bizarre text-speak language had me inferring a more sexual overtone to "Hours later, he comes to---". Physique Pictorial fantasy set-up, indeed.
Regarding the last panel, Congo Bill DID say "quite an explosion, eh?".
Post a Comment